When Did I Say Yes?

Airplane cardThe airplane cabin lights dimmed and gave way to the faint blue glow from a handful of TV screens. Chris and Jill rested their heads on Donna’s shoulders. The spotlight above Alex’s seat cast a golden glow on his textbook. It was good to see him studying.

The question still remained: When did I agree to all this? I tried to recall an official commencing moment between Donna and I, something formal -  like our decision to buy the house, or start a business, those were sealed with a handshake, kiss, or at the very least a wink and a nod.

Yet nothing like that happened with this trip.

I’d compare the agreement factor to when we had our kids. There was no discussion of target dates or quantity. We bought the house, moved in, then looked around and noticed how many rooms we had compared to our apartment. This was followed by murmurings like: “Hey, this room would make a nice nursery.” Or “this part of the lawn would be great for a swing set.” Then all of a sudden – hello – I’m up to my elbows in baby shit.

So what was I doing here – sitting in this seat – flying across the Atlantic and drinking some British brand of cola I’d never heard of? Pretty simple – Donna got the money, then told me to get my ass packing. I wish I could say it was more involved than that, but it wasn’t.

Okay, she wasn’t that abrupt or bossy (God knows I’d never call her bossy), but that’s essentially the way it went down. I didn’t fight much because I felt she deserved this trip of a lifetime. Yes, deserved. She’d been sacrificing for me and the kids all these years. Not letting her go would have made me feel guilty and that’s my second least favorite feeling in the world.

I wish I could provide some epic-sized reason or conclusion as to why I went along, but there wasn’t one. So I’ll just share these polarizing feelings going through my head as the airplane flew through the polar route:

  • I loved Donna and knew she deserved this trip
  • I resented Donna for taking me away from my TV opportunities
  • I was scared to tour Europe with her and the kids, knowing I’d be vulnerable and probably look like an idiot most of the time, jeopardizing any respect I’d manage to earn with them
  • I was excited to see parts of Europe and enjoy the food there.
  • I wanted to escape for awhile – my job, my suburban responsibilities, my show, and my life.

NEXT: Teenaged Travelers Lament

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